Celebrate Life

On July 9, 2012, I nearly lost my best friend.  I'd known her for 8 years at that point.  We'd been through countless hours of conversations and tears. We'd endured a couple of cross-country moves and she'd been a wealth of information to me as I embarked on my divorce and single parenthood journey.  We had drifted a little bit as the miles between us took their toll, but, she'd always been on my mind.

When I received the text that she was having an appendectomy and that the damage was so extensive she nearly lost her life, my own life changed.  Suddenly the miles between us didn't matter, whatever it was that had wedged itself between us didn't matter.  I thanked God for saving her and deciding that her work on Earth wasn't done.

She has been a beacon of light during my darkest moments. She has taught me to embrace the good and bad.  She has taught me to celebrate the JOY in my life and to be thankful for the CRAP that happens too.  She has taught me to stomp GLITTER everywhere because nobody can dull your sparkle.

So, today I celebrate HER.  I celebrate LIFE.  I celebrate LOVE.

Thanks Lord, for keeping her around.

Summer Blog Makeover!

Every summer I try to update the blog to summer graphics.  I think it's the most effort that I've put into my blog in the past seven months.  It's a sad reality.  So much happened over the past six months that I really should have blogged because I know that my situation isn't unique and I'm sure that I've got some insight to offer. For now I'm just going to be happy with just being able to update the graphics.  Our time in Hawaii is done forever, unless we visit again.  I'm both sad and relieved about that.  I am thankful for the lessons I learned there, but, I don't want to be in that emotional dark place again.

Here's to making a plan and sticking to it!

A hui hou!

Adventures ahead.

I don't know where to begin with the last five months.  There is so much that happened that I don't think that I could begin to cover it all in one blog post.  This blog has become a ghost-town and I'm not sure that I have the energy to keep putting effort into it.  I've tried to revive it.  I've tried to remain positive about the situations life has thrown at me, but, admittedly, I'm worn thin.

I've accomplished a lot this summer/fall/winter; I'm proud of that.  I know that it would be okay to share it with the world but I'm feeling a bit reserved about it.

It's a new year and I'm not about to make any resolutions that I can't keep up with.  I'm just living in the moment and getting excited about the adventures that life has for me.

Red, White and Blue!

I was asking Mr. Lovebug what we did for the 4th of July last year and it was so unremarkable that neither of us could remember what we did. I don't know whether to be sad about that or just chalk it up to it was rough year.  It doesn't matter now anyway. We're back in HI and we're much happier than we thought we could be.

This year we wanted to do something low-key.  Crowds were going to be more than we could manage at Ward with Three Doors Down playing.  I didn't want to spend all day prepping food and I didn't care if we got to see fireworks or not.  We opted to do some grilling on the lanai and spend the afternoon swimming.  That was a perfect way to spend the afternoon.  The water was the perfect temperature as was the air temperature.  It was beautiful.  One of the biggest "selling" points on renting this apartment/basement was the pool in the backyard.  I love it.  I love that I have a view of the mountains AND the ocean.  The view makes up for the 900 sq ft we're squeezing into.

We went to the commissary early to avoid the crowds and managed to come out without a scratch or being any worse for the wear! It's a miracle considering it's payday weekend and July 4th.  There was a limited selection of somethings and there was no chicken to be found due to the Foster Farms recall. We decided that our menu would be burgers/hotdogs, Rudy's creamed corn (in the slow cooker), and a Patriotic fruit pizza! Low prep and I had plenty of time to relax before our guests arrived.

The food was delicious and the conversation was good.  All in all, it was a great day.

Dear Blog.

I'm sorry that I've neglected you.  I am sorry that I got so wrapped up in retirement grief that I forgot to show you some love. It's no secret that Tsgt Lovebug became Mr. Lovebug on 01 November 2013.  We made the scary move back to HI for a lot of reasons and many of those reasons just can't be understood by anyone but our family.  So, now that we're finally in our own home, it's time to catch up.  Let's do this.

*tap tap* Is this thing on?

I shouldn't be surprised that it's been over a month since my last blog post.  I was mad at life.  Really mad at life.  I was determined to be miserably unhappy and wallow in my self-pity.  Clearly that approach wasn't successful.  I'm not that person who sees the glass as half empty.  I'm not.  Who was that alter-ego that controlled my thoughts and emotions over the past month? I don't know and I don't want to find out.  Good bye and good riddance.  Let's move forward.

Life is a blessing to be cherished.  I'm going to go with that.

What a difference one year makes.

Last year we were sitting in a house with no HHG, sleeping on air mattresses, watching Netflix on laptops and Nooks and eating on plasticware.  We had just moved to Texas from Hawaii.  It was a culture shock.  It was a temperature shock.  A year a later and we're almost back to that same position.

I'm scared.  I am downright terrified.  I can't put one coherent thought together.  I can't eat.  I want to sleep every moment of the day. Logically, I know that we'll get through this but this is a painful process.  I need a moment to think and I'm running out of moments.

What's the right thing to do? I don't know.  Mr. Lovebug and I will figure this out together though, right? That's what I keep telling myself.